Ten Tips to Help Grieving Families Survive the Holidays After the Death of a Child
When a child has died, the holidays are a very difficult, stressful time for the family. While others are enjoying the festive atmosphere, bereaved families are faced with the specter of an empty chair at the holiday dinner, and the dilemma of whether to hang their missing child’s stocking. Here are ten tips from an expert, a bereaved parent herself, to help grieving families survive the holidays.
Oak Brook, IL (PRWEB) December 2, 2004 --Simply surviving the holidays can be
a difficult task when a family is struggling after the death of a child. While
others are enjoying the usually festive atmosphere, bereaved families are faced
with the specter of an empty chair at the holiday dinner, and the dilemma of
whether to hang their missing child’s stocking.
“The normal stress of the
holidays is compounded tremendously when your child has died,” says Patricia
Loder, executive director of The Compassionate Friends, a national self-help
support organization for families that have experienced the death of a child.
“It is difficult for those who have not gone through the death of a child to
understand the depth of despair which such a loss brings.”
Mrs. Loder,
who had two young children die in a car accident in 1991, says that she has
learned there are many points a grieving family may want to consider during this
holiday season.
* Emotions need relief and should not be stuffed inside
just so others will not be uncomfortable. Give yourself permission to cry, be
sad, laugh, or have fun.
* Do not overextend yourself by trying to host a
party, or even attend a party or gathering, just because you have done so in the
past. Others will understand this is not a good time for you.
* Find new
holiday traditions that can incorporate the child who died.
* If you must
shop for others, find a time when the stores are not extremely busy like early
morning, order through the Internet, or ask others to shop for you.
* It
is therapeutic to discuss and share memories of the child who died.
*
Write down what areas you fear most about the holiday and discuss these with
your family so you can be prepared.
* Remember that holidays are very
important for surviving children. They need the sense of normalcy the holiday
season provides and should be included in holiday planning.
*Consider a
short, private memorial service or candle lighting in memory of your
child.
*Eat well, exercise, get plenty of sleep, and be careful of
consuming alcohol, which is a depressant.
* Remember that the fearful
anticipation of an approaching holiday is usually worse than the day
itself.
“Many people believe they can escape the holidays by leaving home
on a vacation,” adds Mrs. Loder. “This rarely helps because grief can never be
left behind and it is important to have the support of relatives and friends.
Talking with others who have also lost a child can help those facing grief to
understand they are not alone and that others have survived the holidays and
they will, too.”
The Compassionate Friends has chapters in all 50 United
States plus Puerto Rico and Washington DC and nearly 600 total chapters in the
country, offering friendship, understanding, and hope to bereaved families. The
organization has a presence in an estimated 29 countries around the world. For
information on a local chapter or for other means of support, call The
Compassionate Friends toll-free at 877-969-0010 or visit The Compassionate
Friends National website at www.compassionatefriends.org.
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Source : http://www.prweb.com/releases/2004/12/prweb184748.htm